Archive for June, 2008

A Post for Mom

I love you!

Thanks for keeping tabs on my blog. NYC is awesome, and wish you were here to explore it with me. I’m alone… but not lonely. Enjoying the independence and chance to kinda be lost in the crowd. Wish I had more time to just wander around and learn a new place, but must be getting back. =(

Can’t wait to return… SOON.


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Actions Speak Louder Than Words… Proven True AGAIN

Love is not how you feel toward others, but how you behave toward others. When we chose to love, to extend ourselves for others, we are required to be patient, kind, humble, respectful, selfless, forgiving, honest, and committed. It isn’t easy, but do those words sound familiar? 1 Corinthians, chapter 13 is almost always read at weddings, but what is it really saying? It is just talking above love between a husband and wife? This verse is describing love, yet none of those words written are a feeling. They are all behaviors. We have a choice to make about whether or not we will choose to behave lovingly.

True committment is a vision about individual growth, with serious on-going improvement. These days, everyone wants to be involved, but no one wants to be committed. Everyone wants to give and receive love, share themselves in the most physcial meaning of the word, but then throw things out when it gets to be too much effort. Things get too serious, less exciting, life begins to change, and people get scared. Young couples get married because they are “in love”, but we all know feelings change — and can change hourly! What becomes of the relationship when being madly in love subsides? Feelings come and go, but it is committment that carries us through. It’s when the excitment and lust subsides, and you willingly choose to give love anyway that you know it’s forever.

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Grab Hold

laughter and sunshine on a blanket in the grass
green from the spring rains, hearts racing around the track
stolen kisses between lovers, eyes so hungry to see
what dances through the heart but the voice never tells
music lost on our ears, unheard over our love
hundreds of bodies all around us but you’re the only one
unspoken words steal beats from the heart
with meaning so deep the world begins to tumble
locked onto you, no one else has ever existed
outsiders smile to see the two become one
shake their heads in humor at our dancing all around
scared of what is, what will be, what can be
treasure the moment, take slow cautious steps
our tumble goes faster and with it our breath
no longer strong enough to fight it, the pleasure explodes
sighs of love and endearment my head on your shoulder
deep in your pool of green, my heart descends
a free-falling tumble into perfection and you
who i once was lost forever yet finally coming home
together on a fast ride a long curving journey
every second of every day isn’t enough to fulfill
grasp hold of the love and throw caution to the wind
no will to admit the inevitable will come
wish desperately for pefection to outlast what
the darkness will test, press on to hold the light
maybe it is true what we have could be forever
but will we get through, our own minds try to protect
in case our hearts not survive, the ills of the world
eager to steal what is so dear
will we learn from the past and others before
that what we have is a gift so rare and so true
don’t fall for the traps that darkness will create
in the night you cannot see poison under the beauty
is for the devils own glee to take the best from you
let light and life lead us above this broken road
to find what we’re looking for is already there to have and to hold

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Feeling Emo

I’m tired of this roller-coaster called life. I would like, for once, for things to just go smoothly. I don’t want to keep working so hard to get nowhere. I’m running in place, and I’m just exhausted.

I’m gazing out at a beautiful day, listening to couples chat about their afternoon and evening plans, filling up on french baguettes, and I’m trying to figure out how the natural ebb and flow of life has to be so dang consuming.
Even the simple things are tiring. Eating a broccoli cheddar bread bowl had me worn down after 4 spoonfuls. Sitting here is tiring. Listening to everyone talk is tiring. Thinking about everything on my to-do list is tiring. Having people look at me with pity and concern is tiring. I came out to get away from my thoughts, not have my mood reflected back at me in strangers’ eyes.
I just want life to start moving forward at an even pace. I want all of my hard work and effort to be worth something. I want all the emotion I put into life to actually mean something. I’m willing to fight for the things I want in life, but I don’t think everything needs to be a struggle. It would just be nice if somethings would be easy for a change.

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Stay Beautiful

His eyes are like a jungle
He smiles, it’s like the radio
He whispers songs into my window
In words that nobody knows
There’s pretty girls on every corner
They watch him as he’s walking home
Saying does he know
Will you ever know
You’re beautiful
Every little piece, love
Don’t you know
You’re really gonna be someone
Ask anyone
And when you find everything you looked for
I hope your life leads you right to my door
Oh, but if it don’t
Stay beautiful
He finds another way to be the highlight of my day
I’m taking pictures in my mind
So I can save them for a rainy day
It’s hard to make conversation
When he’s takin’ my breath away
~Taylor Swift

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Pocket Full of Sunshine by Natasha Beddingfield

I got a pocket,
got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a love that knows that it’s all mine

Do what you want, 
but you never gonna break me,
sticks and stone are never gonna shake me

I got pocket,
Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a love that knows that it’s all mine

Wish that you could,
but you ain’t gonna own me
do anything you can to control me

The sun’s on my side

Wave me for a ride
I smile up to the sky
I know i’ll be alright

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Take Stock of What You Already Have

Life’s not about getting what you want, but wanting what you get.  We all have dreams and aspirations, things we want to accomplish and a certain lifestyle that we want to live.  But what people tend to forget about are the things they already have.

We need to appreciate the blessings we have in this life, and stop envying “greener” pastures.  Take a second to look around at all the wonderful people you have in your life, the opportunities you have been presented without your begging for them, and give Thanks to these blessings God has given you.
No one is in charge of your happiness but you, so by all means do what you gotta do to be happy. Make whatever changes you need to make.  But first, take stock in what you already have, and I think you’ll see the gap between where you are and where you want to be probably isn’t as big as you thought.

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